Letting go

I believe that I have post tramautic stress disorder.
I had something so deeply devastating happen 3 years ago. It was job related and it shocked my psyche. It shocked me to my core.
I have seen therapists, I've prayed, I've fasted, I've exercised, I've cried. But I can't seem to pull myself out of the funk. I am WALLOWING in my funk.
My funk has made me stagnant. My mental is keeping me captive and preventing me from moving forward.
I need to get better. I HAVE to get better. I need to perservere.
My sadness has caused me to think CRAZY things. To want to do crazy things to myself.
My only motivation is for my kids. They are my ONLY reason for breathing each day